Makily on ice....

...and I don't mean figure skating.

Things are no better today. She did well temperature-wise until about 1:45, spiked again to 104.1. This is with Tylenol/Motrin every four hours.

Her blood work came back normal, not showing elevated white cells.

Dr. Pierre thinks it's a nasty viral bug that is going around. She has seen MANY kids with this type virus that is causing hard to control CRAZY HIGH temps. Usually they end up breaking out in a rash and then the temps start to resolve. She got a shot of Rocephin today (strong antibiotic). Even though we still think this is viral Dr. Pierre didn't want to take any chances especially going into Easter weekend. We split it into two shots because she got such large dose and it would have been too sore and painful to put it all in one leg.

I'm no so much worried about the temperature but HOW HIGH it's going with meds on board. I am so, so, so afraid of a seizure with her. When she spiked at 2 today she started doing this weird "twitch" with her arms and legs...she was totally conscious but it freaked me out and we threw her right in the tub.

She had spiked again to 104 at about six tonight. She has been literally laying with nothing but a diaper on and ice packs all around her and one on her head. To the touch she is cold but her temp is still high.

I am feeling a smidge better but that's with LOTS of naps. If I do too much I feel horrible. I can only imagine how bad Makily feels. Allen is home and is taking care of both of us. I am so thankful because I don't know what I would do right now if he wasn't here.

Please pray for the fevers to come down and stay down. Especially pray for NO SEIZURES. That is my biggest concern right now. There isn't anything else we can do other than what we are doing to bring the temps down and it's not working too well.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

So we are really sick.....

*sigh*

Took her to see Dr. Pierre today. Temp was 102. 02 sat was 95% which was good.

Dr. Pierre checked her ears, throat, chest, etc.

I was thinking sinus infection but Dr. P. really didn't see her temps getting as high as almost 104 over a sinus infection. She had a little fluid in her ears but NO infection or redness and like I said the fluid was MINIMAL.

So we put a "bag" on her little hoo hoo and waited for pee. Thankfully she peed about 30 mins later and the "dip" came back normal but it was sent for culture just in case. They swabbed her for influenza (imagine long q tip and saline drops up the nose....no fun). Dr. Pierre drew her blood. Took three sticks which actually is good considering Makily has ZERO veins to work with. They are all either TEEEENY TINY or have hardened from all the previous IV's and blood draws. Like squeezing blood out of a turnip. At one point Makily sat STRAIGHT up from laying down (she usually needs help for that) to see what Dr. P was doing to her foot. I was way impressed and told her what a good girl she was.....she just screamed and then coughed in my face.

Went for a chest x-ray that revealed "minimal lung congestion" but no pneumonia. They put her in the torture tube for the chest x-ray even though I resisted. She really is too big for it (her thighs looked like stuffed sausages in there) but he swears he gets better pictures that way. She screamed the whole time and kicked her feet, I swear had her feet touched the ground she'd be to Canada by now. She was mad....calmed down as soon as I got her out of that thing though.

We are alternating Tylenol and Motrin right now every four hours whether she's hot or not. Still not giving the Aspirin because she's getting so much Motrin right now.

Her lowest temp today was 101.2....remember that's with meds on board.

Dr. Pierre is supposed to be GONE tomorrow (for Easter) but she is going to call in about the blood work results and then call me and let me know where to go from there.

SHE LOVES MY BABY....WE ARE SPECIAL!

If her blood work comes back bad most likely we'll be doing antibiotics which I DON'T want to do (almost ALWAYS tears her stomach up, makes her g tube leak and gives her diarrhea) but she can't keep having temperatures like this. It increases her chance of breakthrough seizures and I would rather have my armpits waxed, give birth AND go to the dentist than Makily have a seizure. As you know when she does something she goes all out and well, just don't want to go there.


Oh and Makily has given me her "funk" too. Lovely. I sound like Kathleen Turner but not in a sexy way...believe me. Allen got home tonight and brought me some NyQuil I took some and I feel very drunk right now. :-)

I have some vid from today but frankly I am too damn tired to upload anything right now. Maybe tomorrow. Right now though I am going to bed.

Keep praying.

HIGH temps....

As always Makily is really keeping me on my toes....and guessing.

Last night I dosed her before bed at 10pm with Motrin. She had no fever but I was NOT comfortable with putting her down without a dose since Makily tends to spike at night.

She woke up retching and coughing at 4:30 am and was running 101.5. I gave her another dose of Motrin (we have just been doing Motrin only since we stopped the Aspirin). She calmed down and fell back asleep.

I woke again at 8:15 to the same retching and coughing. She was H-O-T....and panting.

I checked her and she was 103.6 AGAIN!!

I gave her Motrin, her heart rate was up, she was panting etc etc. I called Dr. Pierre's office and asked if I should just start alternating Tylenol/Motrin every four or if it was okay she was spiking that high less than four hours after a dose of Motrin. They said to be on the safe side to bring her in today at 1:30 because Dr. Pierre is out tomorrow.

So I checked her temp again at 9:00 (45 minutes AFTER Motrin). She was still panting and her heart rate was still up.

SHE WAS 103.9!!!

That's the highest she has EVER been in her LIFE.

I don't understand how she is going UP with Motrin on board.

I put her in a tepid bath and let her stay there for a while. She was happy as a clam!?

I checked her again about 30 minutes later and she was down to 102.3 but I concerned that it's not bringing her temp all the way down......it only came down with the bath AND a dose of Motrin and it's still not "normal".

Her G. G. is here so I can run to the store for Tylenol and other "sick baby" supplies. Right now G.G. and Makily are sitting on the couch oooh'ing and ahhh'ing at each other, playing and watching Sesame Street. This kid is strange....her arm could fall off and she would look at you smiling and give a giggle (just don't pull out a hairbrush because then you would so be in for it!).

I'll post a video later...pray for my girl.


**finished her birthday "life montage" and it's awesome if I do say so myself. I think I will post it next week. Wait in anticipation**

**Oh and Michelle, remember I said we were hoping to keep her well for Easter this year because she had pneumonia last year for Easter?
I should have kept my big FAT mouth shut huh?**

Update on Makily (part two of last blog entry)

****if you havent read my blog today, read the entry before this to catch up.*****


So we went to Dr. Pierre at 2:15. Daddy got back RIGHT in time to go with us. She weighed 32 pounds with clothes and diapy on. Her temp was fine.

Dr. Pierre listened to her chest, looked in her ears, up her nose and down her throat. Chest and ears were surprisingly fine (usually a temp like that is caused by one of those two things). She has nasal congestion though and some "secretions pooling" in the back of her throat which we *think* is what may be causing the retching. So basically Makily has a cold. I almost felt like one of those crazy hypochondriac mom's then I reminded myself that I can't play around with temps that high with her.

So we are stopping her daily aspirin and doing Motrin every six hours as needed. I thought we were in the clear fever wise but she SPIKED again around six.....103.5 YIKES. We dosed her up (she was almost due) and it went down. She started retching like crazy soon after so we slowed her feed down (she is back on Nutren JR. now, Dr.Pierre wants her EATING if at all possible).

I will say that when we got to Dr. Pierre's I felt like a REAL IDIOT because Makily's temp was totally fine and she was acting happy as a clam. Here's a short vid. of our visit. I tried to get Dr. Pierre on camera but as soon as she realized I was taping she put the chart in front of her face and kept saying "no pictures...no pictures!"

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Snott Factory

I don't feel good, look how dark my eye circles are...they are the are the size of Texas!


Last night I put Makily to bed at 8 pm. This is earlier than her usual 10 pm bedtime. We had the LONG AWAITED gastro appt this morning at 9 am so I wanted to make sure we both got a good nights sleep right?

So around 3:30 AM I wake to hearing Makily coughing and retching like crazy. I run in there and her little face is covered in snot. :-( I turned her overnight feed off immediately.
Before I even got to her I knew she had a temp, she was panting (she does that when she has a fever) and her cheeks were RED. I picked her up and almost panicked when I felt how hot she was. I wiped her face up and she started retching AGAIN. She got herself together and flung herself backwards onto the bed (she wanted to lay back down) and the retching starts right back up. I sit her back up and she is fighting me crying, retching, slobbering and snotting everywhere.

Pitiful.

So I get her cleaned up again, check her temp (we do rectal temps around here....I don't trust those ear things as her canals are TINY and they are almost ALWAYS wrong with her).

It was 102.9.

I immediately start thinking "what if she has a febrile seizure" and how much I would FREAK if that happened so I race into our LOCKED med cabinet looking for the Tylenol. (Makily isn't supposed to have Motrin because she is still on Aspirin from her heart cath and Motrin also thins the blood) Can't find the Tylenol when I remember I sent it to the school "just in case" and all I have is Motrin.

I went ahead and gave the Motrin since she was so hot. I stripped her down and wiped her head and face with a wet washcloth (which she TOTALLY DID NOT appreciate in the least).

She laid on me panting until she fell back asleep. I went to lay her down and she immediately woke up and stared at me all pitiful, I of course felt guilty and picked her right back up. We slept on the couch like that for an hour before my back got so sore it woke me up. I laid her in her bed and she stayed asleep.

I obviously called and cancelled gastro as I was not dragging her to Orlando when she needs to see the pediatrician today. :-( I am glad I had rescheduled the sleep study already because that would have been great had she done that there last night. *sigh*

She woke up at 10 happy and "clapping feet" so I thought we were at least through the night and maybe she would be fever free during the day. No such like, she spiked 102.6 again at 11 so I dosed her with the Motrin again (I skipped her aspirin this morning). I started her on Pedialyte 45cc/hr continuous to keep her hydrated, I am not even trying formula until after she sees the pediatrician. So far no more retching. She is cool as a cucumber right now but we have an appointment with the lovely Dr. Pierre at 2:15 today.

In other news we are getting a Britax Adaptive Car seat in the next couple of weeks! I am so excited (you know you are a special needs mom when you get THIS excited over a car seat). I have looked at the Britax for a while but the $500+ price tag turned my stomach. Allen and I have been looking for a new car seat that will have the support Makily needs and we ha vent found anything that will grow with her. We had started talking about just shelling out the money for it when I told him I would see if CMS could help us. Diane at CMS APPROVED it IMMEDIATELY! She ordered it ALONG with the hardware to install the "latch" system in the van. (it surprisingly doesn't have it!).

I also submitted the "letter of medical necessity" to Apria for Makily to have a Sleep Safe bed. . I figured I would go directly through insurance on our first try to see if they approve it. Click here to see video of the bed "in action" starring Luke. I called BCBS of AL to see if they would give me a list of beds they cover and OF COURSE they won't (I am not surprised but I figured I could try right?). She said as long as they deem that the bed is necessary and "reasonable" it will be covered. I laughed openly at her and said "My kid is four and doesn't walk and you wouldn't pay for her wheelchair, we appealed it three times".

She had no response for that.

If they give us a hard time and don't approve it we again will go through CMS to get help. Typically when CMS gets involved things get covered by the insurance company....and eventually if insurance won't pay...CMS will.

Here is the letter I submitted to BCBS of AL to try and get the bed covered. Hey if it works maybe other parents will find this and be able to use it as a template. I must add writing letters like this about your child is REALLY depressing. Unfortunately it is the fastest and easiest way to get it done though because I know all the things the letter needs to include to get it approved. Dr. Pierre is a BUSY woman so it's faster for her, myself and Makily for me to write exactly what the letter has to say to get approved (you would be surprised some of the things they WON'T approve it for), her to review it and then sign it. I am so lucky to have a pediatrician that is so willing to help us with this stuff.

We'll see what they say:

To Whom It May Concern:



Makily Caldwell is a three and a half year old little girl with Emanuel Syndrome. I have followed Makily’s care since her birth. Makily presents with the following: She has moderate to severe hypotonia. Makily is non-verbal and non-mobile and has global developmental and severe cognitive delays. Makily is not potty trained and the large majority of children with Emanuel Syndrome never are.

Makily has good head and trunk control, she can sit up very well unassisted but is unable to go from laying to sitting up. She is able to go from sitting to laying down although unsafely as she will throw herself backwards. She is not able to pull herself up to stand. She can roll onto either side but will not roll onto her stomach. She enjoys kicking her feet and moving her arms but she is unable to walk or crawl.

She was diagnosed with severe gastrointestinal reflux and severe delayed gastric emptying at six weeks of age. She must sleep on an incline to prevent reflux and/or choking. She has a small airway that is secondary to Pierre Robin Sequence with a repaired cleft of the hard and soft palate. Makily has been 100% tube fed since she was six weeks old and has also been diagnosed with moderate obstructive sleep apnea for which she uses an apnea monitor at night. She has been diagnosed with laryngotrachealmalacia, a floppy epiglottis and severe dysphasia. Due to her dysphasia Makily has excessive oral secretions. Swallow studies have revealed that Makily does aspirate thin liquids (such as water or saliva).

Currently Makily is sleeping in a twin bed with a toddler rail on one side and the other side of the bed is pushed up against the wall. While she non mobile she does toss and turn in the bed and has wiggled down past the railing on several occasions. She fell out of the bed onto the floor recently. She is on continuous tube feeds throughout the night as well as the apnea monitor. Her falling out of the bed could result in her g tube being accidentally pulled out. Makily is in need of a medical grade bed so she may sleep safely and without traumatic incident. At present her parents are having to prop her up with pillows to keep her elevated and also to keep her from wiggling down too far in the bed and falling out. While this does remedy the falling issue it presents a new possible suffocation hazard. With the added pillows in the bed, Makily could wiggle underneath one or get trapped between the bed rail and bed and/or pillows and not be able to free herself. Makily could also become entangled in the feeding pump tubing and/or the apnea monitor cord and wiring. She also has a history of a grand mal seizure. She needs to sleep in a bed that does not have hard railing to prevent injury if seizure were to occur.

Since Makily also kicks her feet and then slams them down in bed it is also important that her bed have soft sides and/or railings. She is also on medications for reflux, seizures, excessive secretions and a blood thinner. The bed should have adjustable height so her parents can give her medications and also change her diaper there, as I mentioned before Makily is not potty trained.

The Sleep Safe would be a wonderful bed to meet all of Makily’s medical and safety needs. This bed can be raised and lowered to fit the parent and child’s needs. The entrapment problem is greatly reduced since the headboard and footboard extend past the mattress. The head of the bed also elevates which will decrease reflux and aspiration issues. The Sleep Safe bed also comes with the option of padded sides which would prevent injury to Makily if she were to have a seizure or kick the side of the bed. It is my medical opinion that this bed is a medical necessity for Makily Caldwell.

Sincerely
Dr. Yves-Lande Pierre


I'll update after Makily's appointment with Dr. Pierre.

Ya know the house where the tree fell?

Those that know me know I worked in a real estate office for four years. I worked in the front office. We got some pretty interesting phone calls at times. This one I will never forget though. I am changing the name of the Realty company....just because.

Me: Good Morning AAA Realty, this is Trish can I help you?

Caller: Yes, I want to know how much that house is.

Me: Sure I can help you with that....which house are you calling about?

Caller: Ugh, you know the blue house.

Me: I am sorry sir, I don't know all the house colors can you give me some more information on it?

Caller: It's the blue house over by where that one tree fell years ago and it laid in the street for days? You know the house right?

**keep in mind I worked for the largest real estate company in Marion County and we literally had HUNDREDS and HUNDREDS of houses for sale**

Me: No I am sorry I don't know which house that is, can you give me the street number?

Caller: Gosh I don't know, it's down that one street though where that tree fell.

**at this point I am getting a little irritated because how the heck am I supposed to help him when all he can say is the blue house where the tree fell, although I had this happen often**

Me: I am sorry sir, we have HUNDREDS of houses for sale and I am not sure where you are talking about, could you remember if there is a name on the sign, you know like the realtor's name?

Caller: Oh ya know I think I did write that down.....let me look and see.....yes, yes here it is....Eves the realtor's name is Eves.

Me: Eve?
*now I am REALLY confused because we have no realtor named Eve*

Caller: No! Eves.....E-V-E-S period.

Me: Eves?

Caller: Yeah Eves...that is what the sign said.

Me: Can you hold for a moment please?

Caller: Sure.

I immediately realize that the caller thinks that the realtor's name is Eves because the sign said "Eves. 444-444-4444" MEANING THE EVENING NUMBER!

I looked around the office thinking SURELY I will see an agent crouched in one of the conference rooms phone in hand chuckling. Nope, this was not a prank....this was for real.

I became hysterical.

Once I composed myself I picked the phone back up.

Me: Sir, was there a phone number after "Eves" name?

Caller: Yep, it was 222-2222

Me: Okay hold please.

So I go down the entire list of Realtors and their evening numbers and find the correct agent. I transferred the man to the agent and was in awe of this poor man's lack of common sense.

Eves.

All About Makily!

Things Makily likes (in no particular order):

TV, SpongeBob Squarepants, Nemo, Swings, being talked to, being sung to, cuddling, jumping in her Jumperoo (although we have to "adapt" it since she is such a big girl now), dancing (you hold her and dance), riding in her remote car, playing with her toys, all the Disney parks, swimming, watching TV upside down and looking at faces upside down (this makes her giggle like crazy), MUSIC, bath time, people with any kind of strange hairstyle, school, Mrs. Leslie and Mrs. Byrd, looking at herself in the mirror, being told how wonderful and beautiful she is, her sleeping bag, her obnoxious turtle and her "symphony" V-tech toy from Laura, her Daddy, watching other kids be naughty, Cops and Police chase shows (she always laughs when they crash), Nanny and Granny....and well okay Mommy :-)

Things Makily HATES:

Hats, things on her face, eating by mouth, laying on her tummy, TV commercials (she screams now when they come on), anything poked in her ears, blankets, shoes, having her teeth brushed, BRUSHING HER HAIR (I get the wrath of Hell every day for that one), water in her face, getting sleepy (she fights it), being put in her car seat, the sun in her eyes, being hot, EEG's and sleep studies.

Like I mentioned above Makily loves music, being sung to and dancing so much. I had her in the den the other night while I was blogging and she was playing. I put some music on and sang and danced like an idiot for her. She loved every minute of it so I decided I had to catch it on video. Makily LOVES my singing and dancing but it has to be INSANE and over the top so Sorry guys you only get to see my baby giggling and not my acting like an idiot for her.

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Side note: The foster thing is taking FOREVER. We aren't getting anywhere fast. Our home study was reviewed by the agency and yet again they have more questions. We have answered HUNDREDS AND HUNDREDS of questions you wouldn't believe and I can't imagine what else they would possibly need to know about us. I have not received them yet but I know they are coming via email next week. We are very frustrated especially when they keep telling how bad they need homes like ours. They are desperate for newborn stay at home foster moms. Allen and I have decided to stop holding our breath and sitting by the phone waiting for it to happen. We are going to live our lives and when we get a call for our license then that's great. Will keep you updated.

I feel like a horse with a carrot dangling in front of me....

or maybe it's chocolate.........perhaps that's why my jeans are too tight?

So after calling our foster agency a few times and leaving messages with the head of licensing I got a call back.

The lady that called said she was "one of the heads of licencing". She says she knows for a fact our home study has been reviewed by the agency BUT that she does NOT know what came of the review. She said "I am sure that is why you are calling to find out if it's been forwarded to the state of Florida or if something is missing right?"

Yeah.

*sigh*

Of course someone else knows the answer to that....and THEY ARE NOT THERE.

*sigh*

She said she would "forward" the email to the "other head of licensing" and that they would call me back. I gave them both my numbers. This was yesterday around hmmmmm..........1:00 pm.

Then she asked me what age group we are fostering....I told her 0-2 but that we prefer newborns. She excitedly said "Oh my gosh we REALLY are in need of newborn foster homes, would you be needing daycare"? I said "well no, I am a stay at home mom and we have many things on hold waiting for our license, if we AREN'T going to get licensed though then I will go back to work but if we do, I am staying home with the baby." She went on and on about how much they need stay at home foster moms for the newborns for bonding reasons. I said "well I have been sitting here at home waiting with an empty crib".

We'll see.

I got off my big butt and wogged today. I went for 30 minutes and didn't push myself. I always feel so much better when I am working out and so I don't know why I ever let myself get out of the habit of doing it. My butt is getting way too big and so I got to do something with myself. I am sure that is one of the reasons my mood has STUNK lately. I am so getting active again.

Back to myself......pretty much!

Okay I have been dusting myself off since my last post.

I just re-read it and wow....pathetic.

I want to thank everyone who left supportive comments. It always helps to read that everyone has those days. I also want to thank everyone that reads my blog. Whether you comment or not I see your visit as a "hit" on my statcounter and my "hits" have really gone up since I started blogging regularly. It's really cool to see people from all over the USA reading about Makily. When I see hits from other countries like Finland, Australia, Switzerland, the UK, Brazil, and MANY from Canada (I see you guys too eh!?) it just blows my mind.

It's uplifting to see that so many people read about my family and love my baby girl! :-)

So I am feeling better today but .....

I really am frustrated with the whole foster parenting thing. I broke down yesterday and called to speak with the "Head of licensing". She of course was in a meeting and so I left a message. No word yet. I am a little concerned that this may ruffle feathers or "stir the pot" since I went above my licensing ladies head. The last two weeks the only answers she can give me though is "I don't know" so I figured I would call someone that could tell me something.

*sigh*

I am starting to get a little worried that we aren't getting any answers because they are concerned about our having a disabled child. I have asked if that would cause any issues from the get go though and they said "no". We'll see.

I will say this though, if I have jumped through all these hoops and waiting ALL this time, and they don't license us....I am going to be VERY ANGRY.

ANYHOO...onto better things.

Since I am on a mission to "perk" up, I will share a few things with you guys that makes me smile!

I have been "blog stalking" as Andrea calls it I happened to find a blog that IMMEDIATELY went to my "favorite" list. Seriously when I was down yesterday I must have watched her "toilet plunger VLOG" video two or three times and cracked up every time. Michelle's little girl has some special needs I can totally relate to her on that level too.

I love her humor!

DAILY GRIND GONE MAD

Check her out, she is HILARIOUS!

I will leave also leave you with two videos that no matter what....make me laugh every time!

Video number one. Nathaniel can really get down. I love his face!


Sticky!? Seriously.....what on earth made him think THAT word!?


By the way can you tell one of my FAVORITE shows is "The Soup"?

Boycotting March.

I feel like one of those weird EMO teenagers that wear their hair in their face and paint their nails black.

As I mentioned before MARCH always sucks for me.

I usually do "okay" unless I have any "extra" problems and then well...just blech. Just been an icky day, Allen had to go to work, Makily is NOT cooperating with me and the gait trainer. My face feels droopy, my jeans are too tight. It's a crappy, lonely and cold day.

Little Noah passed away. He is the baby that Makily was totally enthralled with. I posted a vid a week or so back of her watching him and giggling. He was doing very well and it was pretty sudden.

If you didn't see the video of Makily LOOOVING him here it is::

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Please pray for his family, his funeral is tomorrow.

I will spread more joy here with this horrible poem I wrote while sitting here pondering.....life I guess.

I am a big freaking ray of sunshine tonight.

Aching crying
fake smiling
dreaming
wishing, always needing,
never fitting, sometimes forcing
trying to pretend,
It's never ending

What was to be
never will
was is to be
kills me still
wanting, dreaming, wishing NEEDING
aching, grieving, never leaving.

Haunting thoughts of yesterday
fill my aching head.
They won't let go, and no one knows
just where my heart was led.

The guilt remains in that dark place
I can't go back again.

Am I wasting, forever chasing
what my heart has dreamed?
I can't let go, I want to know
was it ever meant to be?

I'll be back to my "normal" self tomorrow...I think.

I might go wogging in the morning, maybe that will boost my mood.

March sucks.

Random Frustrations.

This will be an entry filled with lots of ranting and raving. It will be all over the place so just bear with me.

1. I am so INCREDIBLY frustrated with the foster licensing process right now I could just cry. I don't know what is going on but I seriously feel so defeated. I call our licensing lady once a week. Last week I call and ask what is going on. She tells me that they (God himself, the mayor, the president who the heck knows who "they" are) haven't even reviewed the FIRST draft of the home study that was sent. *sigh* I call today and asked again what was happening. SAME ANSWER it's STILL not even been reviewed! I just don't understand. We have been going through this process for ALMOST A YEAR NOW! A YEAR!!! I am constantly hearing how there is such a shortage of foster parents, WELL NOW I KNOW WHY! They DRAG their feet so much! I have jumped through every hoop, gotten every piece of paper work, and it's so frustrating that I just have to sit here and wait for someone else to review this stuff. I asked why it hadn't been reviewed and was told "I don't know". What's worse is even when "they"approve it, IT STILL HAS TO GO TO THE STATE OF FLORIDA FOR REVIEW and approval, that can take ANOTHER two weeks (so in their time two months). I don't understand how people like THIS
are licensed to foster while we sit and WAIT! What's worse is I have no one to complain to. I don't want to cause a huge stink because I don't want them to think I am some crazy maniac lady. I WISH WE HAD $30,000 WE WOULD JUST ADOPT! Fertility issues SUCK!

2. My poor baby is a retching maniac lately. The last three nights I have woken up hearing her trying to vomit on the baby monitor. I run in there and sit her up. Last night was really bad and she had only had a little over half of her feed. Our gastro appt is coming up and I am going to speak with him and the nutritionist about putting Makily on a puree diet through her g tube. Zachary's mommy Nikki, contacted me recently about it and told me how much it has helped Zachary so I am hoping it will do the same for Makily. Some thing's gotta give. I feel so bad for her and I don't know what else to do. I spoke with the GI office a week or so ago and they did tell me her upper GI showed "minimal reflux going up past the esophagus". She said that her Nissen is still working except one TINY part that is allowing the "minimal reflux. That could be causing her to retch more but that there isn't much we can do about it other than what we are doing. **I have had people ask me what retching is, well here is a video I found (just a warning, it's not fun to watch). This is exactly what Makily does, it can last anywhere from a few seconds to five minutes of this. When she is able to stop and catch her breath, she cries which triggers the retching again. :-(

3. I hate apostrophe's and every blog I do, I have to go back through spell check and have them inserted (told you this would be random).

4. I had a postal worker harass me yesterday about tape. YES TAPE. I had ebay'd some stuff and took it to the TINY post office down by my house. He came OUT of his cubby to inspect my packages. He said I used the wrong tape. Now understand that I tape everything LIKE CRAZY because I don't want my label to come off or the package to come undone, most of my packages look ridiculous because of the tape. He actually said he wouldn't take my package because I didn't use "clear tape, not scotch or masking". He said my label wasn't going to stay on...I laughed and said there is no way that is coming off, you and I both know that. He told me that I would have to repackage it or take it elsewhere, he wasn't accepting it. Then I thought in my head "am i really sitting here arguing about tape with this man?" SERIOUSLY? I went to the store, bought tape and scissors and came back. I asked him if my tape was "regulation". He said it was but maybe too thin and then asked me if I wanted to use his!?!? I wouldn't have used his tape if it was the last piece of tape on the entire planet. Freaking Tape Nazi.

On a good note the montage for Makily's birthday is coming along nicely. I have more than half of it done already! I figured it would take me longer than it has. I am trying to wait to post it until her birthday but I don't know if I will be able to.

It's that time of year again.

March.......

which is the month before April...

Makily's birthday is April 1.

She will be FOUR!

Most parents rejoice at the upcoming birthday of their child.

Usually I struggle with it.

I remember the JOY I felt all through March of 2004. How elated I was, my baby was finally coming.

Today my grandmother showed me something that I gave her on the day we told her we were pregnant. It was a small gift bag with a pacifier in it. She has kept it and even put a sticker with the date and time I came to tell her.

I couldn't do anything but look at it and cry.

It reminds me of what a happy yet OBLIVIOUS person I used to be.

I am doing another montage for Makily's birthday this year. I pulled out ALL the pictures (we didn't go digital until she was four months), even the bad ones. I sat on the floor in her room and cried.

She looks so bad in some of them.

I will never forget.

ANGER, SADNESS, CONFUSION, SELF DOUBT, EMBARRASSMENT, GUILT, SHAME, GRIEF, HATE, JEALOUSY, FRUSTRATION, LONELINESS, SORROW.

If you bundle all those emotions into one word, that was me back then.

While I am happier than I have ever been in my life, it seems like EVERY March I find myself re-living it all in my head.

As much as I want to be over it and move on, I realize most likely that will never happen.....

....and that's okay.

I wonder what might have been.

Then I remember this IS the way my life is supposed to be and I am a BETTER person because of ALL that we have watched Makily go through. She has changed more people and touched more lives in four years than I have in 30.....and she can't even talk.

I can't make myself NOT feel this way, so I will be sad for a few weeks, and then I will pull my head out of my behind and move on. I did it last year and each birthday before that.

I have also been following Baby Reese, she is four months old. She has Emanuel Syndrome and has yet to leave the NICU. Some of her pictures she reminds me so much of Makily. She had the SAME skin tag on the same cheek as Makily. I look at the pictures of her, I read their blog and it just takes me right back to that place of such fear and uncertainty. I remember telling myself "If we can just get Makily through this....we'll be okay." Then something else would happen and I found myself again wondering when we could relax. Since then I often lay Makily's head on my shoulder and breathe in as hard as I can and try to memorize her smell. When I hold her while she is sleeping I just stare at her and I try to memorize every feature of her face, the way her hair feels when I rub her head, the way she curls up in my arms and makes sleepy baby noises in her sleep.

When Makily had her seizure back in 2006 , I really thought we were going to loose her. I remember standing in the ER watching her body slowly twitching. I could see the doctors struggling to intubate her. I could hear her coughing and gasping for breath and thinking "I am not ready yet". I haven't held her enough, I haven't smelled her baby smell enough times or heard her sweet voice or laugh enough.

The truth of the matter is that you NEVER know what to expect with Emanuel Syndrome children. I know of some ES kids that were doing exceptionally well and then the died out of no where.

They are unpredictable....but I guess life itself is unpredicatable.

Makily's seizure scarred me and when she is at school, if the nurse calls me, I hold my breath until she says "she's okay". I honestly don't know if her body could handle another seizure like that and in the back of my mind, the thought of something happening is always there.

I know I will never hear her laugh enough, stroke her head enough or smell her sweet Makily smell enough to ever be okay with loosing her.

I can never totally breathe a sigh of relief with her.

It's an uncertainty that I will carry with me forever.....

......and that is incredibly hard.

Please pray for Baby Reesie and her family as they live through some
of the most difficult times of their lives.

Hypotonic Baby + 31 degree weather = Scatterbrained Mamma!

Last night it was C-O-L-D.

It was supposed to get down to 27 degrees here in Central Florida last night. All you Northerners are probably laughing at me but for this Native Florida gal...THAT'S COLD!

I put Makily in bed with me because she WILL NOT sleep with a blanket on her. She kicks it off IMMEDIATELY. When you put it back on she thinks it's a fun game and giggles while kicking it right back off. If I put her in with me I can throw a blanket over her when she falls asleep.

Usually she sleeps in just a diaper and bib.

Why no footed sleeper you ask?

I have a HORRIBLE time finding footed sleepers that are snap up (don't like the zips ups because it's hard to access the G tube). FORGET finding a snap up one in a 4t. For some reason they area all zip ups. I went ahead and bought the zip up footed sleepers a few weeks ago to try. I was really excited and figured I would just cut a hole in the tummy area for G tube access (I know GHETTO). So I put one on Makily to figure out where to put the hole. The only sleepers I could find in her size had a zipper that goes like this one.....notice the zipper goes down one leg?



Well my baby has big thighs and a big ole booty. The leg that it zips up on ends up looking like a stuffed sausage and she gets MAD! Ladies, I imagine it's a lot like when you wear panty hose and somehow one leg gets twisted and ends up cutting the circulation off in that leg. Pretty much what Makily's "sausage zipper leg" looks like.

So for all these reasons I just put her in bed with me.

She slept until about 2:30 AM. Then she decided it was time to chat, whine, kick, giggle and "patt patt" me on the head. This went on until about 5 am when she fell back asleep.

You can imagine how excited I was to get up when the alarm went off at 6 am. I debated whether or not I should send her to school because it was so cold and usually she could get sick from the crazy weather change. I told myself to not be lazy and get up and take her anyway...she'll be fine.

I kept hitting snooze and before I knew it, it was almost seven. Makily has to be to school between 7:15 and 7:45.

YIKES!

I get up and Makily is of course sleeping. I went and got a pair of long johns for her, a warm outfit and her jacket. I woke her (she wasn't thrilled), put both layers of clothes on her (to which she was ZERO help and screamed).

Then I tackled her hair. Makily's hair while GORGEOUS is a NIGHTMARE for ME. She acts like I am killing her when I brush it.. Today was no exception and I think because she knew I was in a hurry she decided she would be EXTRA mean to me. Once I finally got her hair brushed out and beautiful I spent the next five minutes saying "Makily what the heck did I do with your pink squeaks"!?!??! (referring to her pink squeaky shoes).

I finally have her ready and race around getting her bags together. I throw on a jacket and flip flops (can you say icy toes?), grab her, her bags and head to the van. By the time I got to the front door Makily is slipping down my body. When you carry Makily she is ZERO help. She does not "cling" on like most kids....she expects to be totally supported mostly because she is hypotonic. I throw everything down and slide her back up and race to the van. By the time I got there I was carrying her like a foot ball. I put her in the car seat, threw the bags in the front seat when I realize I have no keys.

I run back into the house grab the keys (thankfully in my rush I didn't lock the door)and race back to the van.

I get Makily half way to school when I realize I had left MY LIFE (my wallet) on the hood of the van along with my cell phone in it AGAIN!

Only this time, I didn't see it fly off!

WONDERFUL!

So I drop Makily off at school and drive back and forth three times FEVERISHLY looking for my life.

I didn't find it.

I come home and I am thinking about ALL the cards I have to cancel and duplicates I am going to have request. I go to call and notice there is a strange number on my caller ID.

I check the message THANK GOD, the neighbor up the street called, THEY FOUND MY LIFE!

He said he came out to warm his truck up. He went back inside and when he came back my life was laying on the hood of his truck!!

I was so thankful I almost cried. It did suffer some damage but I am proud of how much it has held up seeings as it has now been thrown from a moving vehicle twice.



To top it all off. The school nurse called me and told me that Makily was really congested and sleeping a lot and that I should come pick her up.

I shouldn't have gotten out of bed!

Losing My Religion.

I have ALWAYS loved music and I am one of those people that will hear a song and say

"Oh this is sooo me!"

Allen likes to make fun of me for this. In the beginning of our relationship he was well....Allen was a jerk and he will tell you that himself. I knew underneath his hard shell there was an amazing guy (I was right ;-) I recall once telling him that "I can't make you love me" was our song. I loved him and he was VERY stand offish early on in our relationship. Not long after that Allen and I were in the car and he says "Oh I heard a song this week and it made me think of us". Of course you can imagine my happiness in that Allen had picked a song that made him think of me right?

He played the song.....it had an incredibly LOOOOOOOONG intro (remember all the while I am waiting with baited breath to hear the words to the song that he thought was "us"). Anyway once the singing started and I realized it was some 80's metal band screaming the words "I want ya to rock me" I wanted to punch him. While he thought it was funny I didn't see the humor. I assure you Allen is a changed man and I have since forgiven him for his evil ways of the past.

So today I decided to go for a walk. I had my IPOD and somehow ended up with music on there that I didn't really mean to put there. Allen has been using it lately and at times I can't seem to figure out how to get his stuff off.

The song "Losing my Religion" by REM came on.

The first memory that sparked from hearing this song was how when it came out how everyone was up in arms about not only the lyrics but the video. I never really paid much attention to the song because in our household it was one of "those" songs and we just didn't listen to it. I didn't really understand it anyway. I was in to New Kids On The Block at the time and was too busy planning my wedding with Joey McIntyre (circa 1991)!

Give a 14 year old girl a break!

The second memory that was sparked was how I listened to this song over and over in the months after Makily was born. While this song is said to have so many meanings the lead singer of REM Michael Stipe who wrote it claims it was about an obsessive relationship.

When Makily was born I had a totally different interpretation of the song.

The lyrics were all the things I felt and wanted to say to God and felt guilty for thinking and wanting to say.

I walked up the driveway of my house and laid in the middle of my yard with my headphones turned backwards, eyes closed and listened to the song over and over. I noticed every now and then I had tears in my eyes. I wonder what my neighbors were thinking I was doing.

I did something I try not to do too often, I let myself think about how I felt in the months after Makily was born.

I was so confused about my entire life.

I felt like I was being forced to be something, someone I couldn't and had no desire to be. I felt that I was being tested and that God knew it was a test I would fail miserably.

I questioned everything I had ever believed and wondered why if God was real would he let my child suffer, force me to watch her suffering, make it my fault she was suffering (since I am a carrier for Makily's genetic problem). To top it off, how could I have more babies knowing that I could have another sick one?

I felt like a fool.

I believed God was laughing at me.

What type of cruel God does that?

It made no sense and it was a constant struggle for me to pray. I hated God. I had begged him to give me a baby and he finally did, and she was near death.

I also felt like I was right in the spotlight. Like everyone around me was waiting for me to fall apart. I tried to pretend I was okay but I was really awful at faking it.

I felt like the "happy normal" life I thought I was going to have once Makily was born was just a fantasy.....a dream that wouldn't come true......ever.

It took me several months, but I started to see how all of this was foreshadowed YEARS before Makily was even born. My life read like a book. God had been preparing me for this all along. It was my destiny. I don't know why he picked me to be Makily's mother.

One of the things I remember thinking vividly when the doctor diagnosed Makily was that I would never laugh again. Never have fun, the good part of my life was over and I was destined to live a life of sorrow, sadness and suffering.

Almost four years later I see that I couldn't have been more wrong.

I am the happiest I have ever been in my life.......and it's BECAUSE of Makily.

Here are a few scriptures that have helped me along the way:

Proverbs 3:5, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding."

Psalm 139 : 13-16
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful,I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

We've come a long way from this...........

Loosing My Religion
by REM

Oh, life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no, I've said too much
I set it up

(chorus)
That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight, I'm
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool, fool
Oh no, I've said too much
I set it up
Consider this
Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

But that was just a dream
That was just a dream

(repeat chorus)

But that was just a dream
Try, cry, why try?
That was just a dream
Just a dream, just a dream
Dream

Here's the video, it's kind of freaky and I almost didn't post it on my blog but I wanted you to be able to hear it as well as read the lyrics.

WARNING: Picture Overload

For those that have not seen Makily's caringbridge page yet I am going to be doing ALL of her updates here from now on. It seems like if I am updating one page regularly, I am neglecting the other. I hope that meshing this site with her CB site will make it easier for me to manage. I promise to update on Makily weekly IF NOT DAILY! :-) I also will be moving this around and possibly remodeling the site in the next couple of weeks. Of course all her new pictures will be posted here now.

That being said....I will begin the picture OVERLOAD for today.

Is it Makily or Allen? One may never know!


Shamoo


HOLY COW, DO YOU SEE SHAMOO!?!?


Our hands :-)


Yes I really am this sweet and innocent......really


Cousin Hailey with Aunt Tammy in the background
(I was trying to be photographically unique, Andrea notice the no pants!? lolol)


Cousin Hailey with more bubbles!


Our attempt at getting the girls picture together with them both looking at the camera. For some reason when Hailey sat on the blanket she thought she had to lay down!?


AHCK! Makily's not looking! Cute one any way


Bubbles make her happy!


REALLLY HAPPY!


Just because it's funky


Sleeping Angel in a Wagon


Ugh really what's with all the wires people!? Her last sleep study (Jan 2008)


Shopping it's so exhausting....*sigh*

Whirlwind...

This week has been crazy!

Allen had to have a sleep study on Monday night. He snores like a freight train. So bad that at times I end up getting up in the middle of the night move to the couch.



I figure hey, he has to sleep in a truck during the week for work, I can sleep on the couch when he is home so he can have a bed.

It's a fair trade right?

It's gotten much worse the last couple of years. I half jokingly have been telling him that he dies several times a night. I watch him sleep and have noticed that often he tries to take a breath in three or four times, then usually he will gasp, yell in some strange language (this part usually makes me giggle) and then go back to snoring. I will admit though I have thought of putting my pillow over his head to shut him up (not really people come on now!). He can't help it but really at 3 am when I am desperately trying to sleep all I can hear is his insane SNORE and I start to get mad.

Finally after my nagging him to death for the last three years...he decided to go see a Pulmonologist whom immediately gave him a c-pap just from hearing the description of what Allen does in his sleep. So here is the incredibly sexy mask my man gets to wear at night. (by the way this is not Allen, if I posted pictures of him with his mask on I may have to come live with you).



I know it's hot right?

Imagine this contraption on his face PLUS an even cooler chin strap around his head to keep his mouth closed. When Allen told me about having to possibly wear a chin strap we both hysterically laughed. I mean is it possible to make my poor husband look anymore ridiculous in his sleep? We have lovingly dubbed him "Chinstrap Caldwell".



The FIRST night Allen had the cpap I was totally amazed, he didn't snore...or gasp one time. So he had the sleep study Monday night and his appointment to go over it Tuesday. The Pulmonologist told us Allen has SEVERE obstructive sleep apnea. He had 150+ apnea episodes and desatts down to 73%. Scary. During the sleep study they did try the chin strap on him because he kept opening his mouth in his sleep. The woke him up a little later to say the chinstrap was not working and Allen was STILL opening his mouth. Allen says "that chin strap just got in my way". I'm still calling him "Chinstrap Caldwell" though, it just has a nice ring to it.

Yesterday we took Makily to Sea World. It was a total blast and because our niece is an employee we got in free. All of Allen's family went and we really had a great time. The dolphin show seemed to be Makily's favorite this time. That and of course the "Oddysea" show. She laughed like a maniac through that one as always.

Still working on our fostering license. I have officially stopped holding my breath on that. Seems like we get EVERYTHING done and they come up with something else we need or some other piece of paper work they want. I just do whatever they tell me as quickly as I can (usually THE DAY they tell me) and hope that the next call will say we are licensed. This week we had to answer FIFTY more questions about our lives and childhood (50 for each of us by the way so really 100). The questions were all things we have answered before. To say it annoyed me to do it all over again for the 5th time is an understatement but give me a hoop, I'll jump through it. Then I had to send them our renewed car insurance cards, and get ANOTHER reference. THANKS DANA, I love you girl for doing that on such short notice.

I heard back about Makily's small bowel follow through.

It's normal.

*sigh*

I know I should be happy but really I am not. This poor kid has chronic constipation or diarrhea and retches at least 2-3 times a day. I was convinced that her intestines were not moving like they should. I was wrong. The test says they are fine.

HOW IS IT THAT HER INTESTINES MOVE NORMALLY BUT SHE IS EITHER CONSTIPATED OR HAS WATER DIARRHEA!?

I don't know.

We see gastro in two weeks and I am sure he will go over it then. The retching really just breaks my heart. She looks so scared and out of control. I can't do anything about it when it's happening except say "It's okay Makily, breathe baby, catch your breath". Usually it just makes me cry.

Gee what a lot of help I am.

Makily goes back to Pulmonology next month for a second sleep study for HER sleep apnea. They are going to try her on c-pap to see how she tolerates it. She hates things on her head or face so I am not sure how this is gonna work. She surprised me in the hospital in December when she wore the mask then so maybe she will do it now!?

I can't believe I am going to be living in a house with two "Masked Avenger's".

My Baby's Joy

Sorry I have been a blog slacker this week. I promise next week will be better.

***Please notice the new link under "friends and favorites" for Baby Reesie. She is three months old and recently diagnosed with Emanuel Syndrome. She is still in the NICU, please visit her site and offer her prayers and lots of love.

I don't have much to say tonight, I am in a rush. I made another new Makily video. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

At a snail's pace

That is how quickly our foster licensing process is going.

*sigh*

The licensing specialist (LC) came and approved the fireplace door. We ended up taking a regular four slated fire screen, removing one slat and then we attached it to the front of the fireplace. It's hinged and everything. My husband is Mr. Handy Man.

She looked at the medication cabinet, the locked up gun and separate locked up ammo case. She went into the foster baby's room and dropped the bomb.

She says "Oh I forgot, you have to have a toddler bed".

*sigh*

Before anyone starts asking NO this was NEVER told to us beforehand. We started this process nine months ago and have had at least five home visits and just now we are being told we needed a toddler bed.

Why do we need a toddler bed when we are fostering 0-2 year olds you ask?

Well that is because the state will not allow us to put a 2 year old in a crib. Understandable BUT it would have been nice had someone mentioned this say four months ago?

We bought the bed today and the room is all set up with a crib and a toddler bed. We only plan on fostering ONE at a time. I am a smidge nervous that they may want to push more than one child on us knowing we have TWO beds in that room.

Here is what we are waiting on now.

Our LC gives our packet to her supervisor. She reviews EVERYTHING to make sure no one has missed or forgotten anything (how that is possible at this point I don't know). Once she approves it, our LC comes out to our house again for Allen and I to review the packet and sign off on it. (she will be making sure we have the toddler bed) Then it is sent to the State of Florida for review and THEN we are licensed.

How long all that will take....I have no idea.

Here is a little montage I did of the Foster Baby's room.

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Baby's Got Wheels!

***FYI: updated Makily's CB page today with medical stuff. check it out, link is in the "link section to the right"****

Allen and I have LONGED to get Makily one of those cool power wheel cars that she can drive. She isnt able to actually "drive" anything at this point she we just never bought her one.

Another special needs mom had said they found a power wheels with a remote control for the parent. It was a big pricey for us so we just didnt really look into it.

I went looking on ebay and found one for $150 WITH SHIPPING!

YES WITH SHIPPING!

Here is a link to the guy that we bought it from.

REMOTE CONTROLLED RIDE IN CARS FOR TODDLERS

It's a small car but it is perfect for her and she loves it. I would recommend this for ANYONE with a toddler or a special needs toddler that is able to sit up independently.

Here's a video of Makily in her new Ferrari.

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Super Mom??

Mmmmm....not so much!

So this morning was a crazy one.

Makily has been sick for over a week now and is JUST NOW able to eat again. She was retching at one ounce and running fevers on and off. Yesterday I finally got her back up to full feeds. So today was her first day back to school since she got sick.

We spent a few days over the weekend in Orlando because Makily had a sleep study. I still hadnt totally unpacked and put everything in it's place yet.

HUGE MISTAKE.

This morning I get up and start getting her ready for school. Nothing was where it should be and some stuff was still in suitcases so I am running around like a mad woman looking for her right shoe or her brush. She had her bath last night so I just had to dress her and do her hair. She screamed like a MANIAC the entire time I did her hair.

I get her backpack re-packed with school stuff only. I go to pack her feeding pump and realize I have no opened case of formula in the house. So I have to find some scissors, open the HUGE box of formula to get the smaller box, then rip that open grab two cans of formula. I go put her in the car along with all her stuff when I realize....her Kidcart is in the house. Allen had taken it out when he packed the van.

ACK!

So I go get the Kidcart, take it apart put it in the van. I get in the van and realize while I have the pump and formula, I had not packed, set, or loaded it in it's case. So I start the car, pour the formula into the pump bag. I begin driving to the school with the window down while priming her feeding pump at the same time. As I am priming her pump while driving I think to myself

"Wow I am SUPER MAMMA, here I am priming a feeding pump while driving". I was so impressed with myself I ACTUALLY was thinking of buying myself a "Super Mom" shirt.

My head starts to swell as I revel in what an efficient multi-tasker I am....when suddenly I see something out of the corner of my eye. It's something black and is FLYING through the air away from the van.

I look in the rearview and realize in a panic what it was.

It was "My life".

Those that know me, know what my life is. My friend Justin sometimes mistakenly calls it my brain (which actually is an appropriate name for it). It's a "personal planner" with EVERYTHING in it. My credit cards, money, checks, appointment cards, phone numbers, Makily's id, my license. (see why I call it my life?) In my rush to leave the house I had put it on the hood of the van and forgot to get it off.

As I see it flying through the air I notice something else seperate and fly away from it.

My cell phone.
(my life has that little cell phone pocket in the front).

In a panic I pull over, turn around and go back to the area where I saw "my life" land. I am feverishly searching when low and behold there it was. THANK GOD I had zipped it closed so it was all intact. I thought for sure my cell phone was a lost cause but I looked a bit more and found it about 10 feet away.....flipped open and dead. I put it on the charger when I got in the car and SURE ENOUGH THE SUCKER WORKED!

So Makily was about 10 minutes late to school today. When they asked me why she was late to this morning for her tardy slip I just said "Ugh, the alarm didnt go off".

Super Mom, I am not.