So Allen and I are horrible neighbors.
We don't associate with any of them.
I sorta know the old guy catty corner to us but we just wave at each other.
There is another old man that sits on his walker down the street and waves. He is always outside on his walker.
I bet he's bored....anyway....
Jakob plays outside all the time.
My neighbor behind us came over the other day with a variety of things from my yard. I'm immediately embarrassed as she tells me she found all of those things in HER yard.
Someone threw them over the fence.
I start apologizing and saying I will take care of it and make sure it doesn't happen again. She then tells me that it hadn't happened before and she thought it may have involved other kids in our yard....the day before we had friends over with their kids so it was possible. I thanked her and apologized again and she went home.
Yesterday she shows up at my door with her two year old on her hip and a bag of doggie biscuits. I'm in sweats and a t-shirt with glitter on my face from having had my makeup done by Trishtwo the night before for her portfolio (she's a makeup artist). I'm just disheveled.
Portfolio costume makeup by Trishtwo. I'm a devil.
She tells me that she coupons and got an entire case of doggie biscuits for free and so she brought us a bag. I realize at this point she is trying to make friends. I took the doggie treats and thanked her. Jakob then comes barrelling to the door screaming with SallyWaWa on his heels barking away. He runs into me throws up his arms saying MOMMY I UP...I UP! I pick him up as the neighbor lady is discussing how to coupon and bla bla bla all the while Jakob is reaching over me to ring the door bell. If I didn't let him ring it he fought me more and made me look like EVEN more of an idiot to this nice doggie biscuit bearing neighbor.
Each time he'd ring the bell he would hysterically laugh and say "Mommy I bell".
Someone kill me now please.
The lady continued to talk while Jakob and I did the doorbell shuffle. The entire time her little boy was perched perfectly on her tiny hip, quietly holding his sippy cup.
I remember thinking this lady must think WE ARE FREAKING NUTS.
I told her I would try to stop by one day for coffee and we could chat and she could show me how to coupon.
She said coffee gives her acid reflux.
I think she changed her mind about making friends.
Ha.
We don't associate with any of them.
I sorta know the old guy catty corner to us but we just wave at each other.
There is another old man that sits on his walker down the street and waves. He is always outside on his walker.
I bet he's bored....anyway....
Jakob plays outside all the time.
My neighbor behind us came over the other day with a variety of things from my yard. I'm immediately embarrassed as she tells me she found all of those things in HER yard.
Someone threw them over the fence.
I start apologizing and saying I will take care of it and make sure it doesn't happen again. She then tells me that it hadn't happened before and she thought it may have involved other kids in our yard....the day before we had friends over with their kids so it was possible. I thanked her and apologized again and she went home.
Yesterday she shows up at my door with her two year old on her hip and a bag of doggie biscuits. I'm in sweats and a t-shirt with glitter on my face from having had my makeup done by Trishtwo the night before for her portfolio (she's a makeup artist). I'm just disheveled.
Portfolio costume makeup by Trishtwo. I'm a devil.
She tells me that she coupons and got an entire case of doggie biscuits for free and so she brought us a bag. I realize at this point she is trying to make friends. I took the doggie treats and thanked her. Jakob then comes barrelling to the door screaming with SallyWaWa on his heels barking away. He runs into me throws up his arms saying MOMMY I UP...I UP! I pick him up as the neighbor lady is discussing how to coupon and bla bla bla all the while Jakob is reaching over me to ring the door bell. If I didn't let him ring it he fought me more and made me look like EVEN more of an idiot to this nice doggie biscuit bearing neighbor.
Each time he'd ring the bell he would hysterically laugh and say "Mommy I bell".
Someone kill me now please.
The lady continued to talk while Jakob and I did the doorbell shuffle. The entire time her little boy was perched perfectly on her tiny hip, quietly holding his sippy cup.
I remember thinking this lady must think WE ARE FREAKING NUTS.
I told her I would try to stop by one day for coffee and we could chat and she could show me how to coupon.
She said coffee gives her acid reflux.
I think she changed her mind about making friends.
Ha.
1 comments:
I've been reading for a while from the UK, and love your writing - funny and honest and brave. Hope things keep feeling brighter for you.
(Apologies for not commenting before - just shy).
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