So I started Jenny Craig three weeks ago.
My butt is too big and my tummy well...I won't even go there.
I half jokingly say my stomach looks like a road map since having Makily from all the stretch marks.
My friend Janie and sister Deborah have inspired me. Janie's lost I believe 50+ lbs recently. Deborah has lost almost 40 on Jenny Craig. I called Deborah and asked what day she went in every week this way we can go in together. I gave Deborah a really gross but humorous description of how fat I am getting. I can't share it here because while HILARIOUS, it's mortifying at the same time. I cross the line enough on my blog as it is right?
I have struggled with my weight since I was a teenager really. Up and down and up and down. Our family was NOT blessed with the "skinny genes" by any stretch of the imagination.
SO NOT FAIR I might add.
I am also an emotional eater. Really everyone in my family is.
Happy? "Let's have cake"!
Sad? "Let's cry over a tub of Ben and Jerry's".
Bored? "I wonder if Allen left any of those "Dibs" in the freezer"?
Angry? "Hi, I'll have a number one, no lettuce a LARGE sweet tea and LARGE fry...and NOW"
Depressed? "Back up the truck....BEEP, BEEP, BEEP"
In high school I was able to keep weight off because I was so active. I was on the dance team so I had killer legs. Of course even then I thought I was fat.....see it's totally a psychological thing too. I am never completely happy with what I look like. Last time I was at goal I still thought I was fat. *sigh*
I also have this other problem. When I diet....I usually CRASH into it. I barely eat, work out like a maniac until I am so sore I can't move. It takes about a month of that and I burn out. I know they say "don't starve yourself, eat at least xxx amount of calories a day". In my hard headed mind I have always figured "I ate five grapes, a bowl of soup and 3 bottles of water, I am so loosing weight".
FINALLY I am eating the amount I am told to eat and I am not going to starve myself.
I started working out but again I am NOT going to kill myself doing it. Deborah and I walked Sat and Sun. I only walked....did not jog...which for me is hard. I always figure in my head "If I jog like a demon I am burning more calories right"? Yesterday I did a walk/jog aka "wogging" and only jogged for two minutes at a time.
For me music is a MUST HAVE for walk/jogging. I can't stand to listen to myself breathing all heavy and my feet on the pavement. UGH.
Here is a list of music on my IPOD right now. I have to say some of it is "rageful" but it's great to listen to as a SN parent.....or really anyone with high stress in their life!
One Step Closer
Numb
Stronger (Kanye)
Gold Digger (Kanye)
Shakles (Praise You)
How Far We've Come
Desert Rose
Dragula (Rob Zombie and while this song creeps me out, I run like a wild woman during it)
Lean Like a Cholo (the title to that cracks me up)
When I Grow Up
Harder To Breathe
Maneater
CandyMan
Girlfriend
I have lost 1.5-2 lbs a week so far. Of course I want to loose more a week but I realize this is NOT realistic. I am annoyed that I don't loose as quickly as I did back when I was 22. Then again I know loosing slowly help you keep it off so I guess I can be happy with that.
My goal is to be able to do a five mile hike in November with my Dad and Allen. We are going to TN for vacation as a family again and are going to Cades Cove. There is a waterfall that I want to go see but it's a five mile round trip hike.
Hopefully I will be in shape enough to do it.
6 comments:
tara said...
you know i understand what you're going through. my friend in tampa went from a 16 to an 8 doing weight watchers. hollie and i play tennis and she loses 6lbs in 4 days and i lose nothing. but what's worse is that when i try, i only really try for a week and then i either lose motivation or subconsciencely sabatoge myself. i too and an emotional eater. i get positive and then i get so negetive when i don't see results right away like "what's the point, you're never gonna stick it out, you're never consistent with anything" sometimes i really do feel i need a therapist. i've always been fat. just look at that pic allen has of me! i just wanna give up, but i can't. i'm the biggest i've been in a long time and i hate the way i look, but even more, i hate that i won't change myself. sigh, just wanted to get that out b/c i knew you'd understand...
hailey still asks to watch "kily" videos on my cell phone and points to her on the fridge (there's 2 pics) and says "kiley!" or "kiley?"
i got sad the other night thinking that if i stay here a while, the next time i see her she might be too grown to hold again. ah well,as far as the scrap booking blog goes, just keep the hope alive. she keeps surprising us with new things, so, who knows what she'll end up doing? she's a trooper and i can't wait to see her and you guys again. hopefully i'll be skinny by then! ha! keep me updated with jenny craig. you and queen latifah can do it!
Good for you!!! Good luck and....you know you're beautiful...right? :^)
Good Luck with this Trish.
Don't get discouraged if you don't lose weight one week, keep track of your measurements too.
I lost 35 pounds with Weight Watchers.. it took a while, but I got it off and it stayed off until I had Helyn. Now I am struggling to get the last 10 off again.
Think of how good you will feel 5 and even 10 pounds lighter. You have a great attitude going into it.
Best of luck. I'm doing Weight Watchers on-line, losing slowly at 1-2 pounds a week which seems painfully slow but hopefully will work out better in the long run. Usually I lose a lot of weight fast and then gain it back and then some. Plus now that I'm older it's harder to lose.
By the way, FWIW: "lose" is spelled with one o. Sorry. Recovering English major here.
Best of luck to you! Hang in there. I hope the Jenny Craig works for you. I like to eat out way too much so it didn't for me, but the food is goooood! Keep up the wogging. That helped me lose. I know about emotional eating and those fat genes! Love you, J
we went to cades cove a while back and i believe we did that hike to the waterfall. so cool... and so tiring! but worth it! good luck!
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